Frogs are made of cotton candy
Over at Cracked there’s a list of video game clichés. Far and away my favourite is the one wherein water is immediately toxic.
All video-game characters are in fact made of cotton candy. This theory, and only this theory, can explain the cat-like hydrophobia shared universally by their kind. How else are we to believe that Frogger, a frog, is killed instantly on contact with water?
It’s so true. Frogger is a frog. A frog. Born in water. Needs to stay moist to survive. You’d think he’d be less happy on the highway, where the hot blacktop burns and bakes him, but there he’s only concerned with trucks. It’s the water he fears, because it kills on contact.
Frogger would rather be on the back of a turtle or crocodile, than in the water. Why then does he want to build a nest there in the first place? I don’t hop on stones floating in acid to raise a family.
