Demon Clown Baby » baby http://www.demonclownbaby.com There'll be good content here... someday Thu, 27 Oct 2011 15:28:19 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 We have the best baby ever. http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2009/04/20/we-have-the-best-baby-ever/ http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2009/04/20/we-have-the-best-baby-ever/#comments Mon, 20 Apr 2009 23:55:55 +0000 admin http://www.demonclownbaby.com/?p=148 Wife: I don’t think other people love their babies as much as we love ours.
Me: Or if they do, they have less reason to.
Wife: You’re such a creep.
Me: How is what I said any more creep-ish than what you said?
Wife: I said it first.

]]> http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2009/04/20/we-have-the-best-baby-ever/feed/ 0 1 Year Old! http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/07/23/1-year-old/ http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/07/23/1-year-old/#comments Wed, 23 Jul 2008 21:22:29 +0000 admin http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/07/23/1-year-old/ I just want to say that my daughter is one year old this month and is the cutest baby in the entire universe, and everyone else’s baby is rubbish in comparison. Thank you.

]]> http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/07/23/1-year-old/feed/ 0 Baby April Fool’s http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/04/02/baby-april-fools/ http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/04/02/baby-april-fools/#comments Wed, 02 Apr 2008 17:09:19 +0000 admin http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/04/02/baby-april-fools/ Me: Whoa, come quick!
Wife: What is it?
Me: The baby just stood up all on her own! I let go and she was just standing balanced for a few seconds!
Wife: Wow, really?
Me: No. April Fool’s.
Wife:

I wasn’t trying to be mean, but I guess it came out that.

]]> http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2008/04/02/baby-april-fools/feed/ 0 Baby grows teeth to spite parents http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2007/12/20/baby-grows-teeth-to-spite-parents/ http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2007/12/20/baby-grows-teeth-to-spite-parents/#comments Fri, 21 Dec 2007 00:42:25 +0000 admin http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2007/12/20/baby-grows-teeth-to-spite-parents/ Our little Demon Clown Baby got her first tooth last Thursday. I suspected it was because I was making fun or her, on account of being bald and toothless, unable to walk, etc. So she grew a tooth.

Well, I just started calling her bald and teethless.

But the very next day, she grew another tooth!

Well that put me in my place.

But she’s still bald.

]]> http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2007/12/20/baby-grows-teeth-to-spite-parents/feed/ 0 Insulting the baby! http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2007/10/03/insulting-the-baby/ http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2007/10/03/insulting-the-baby/#comments Thu, 04 Oct 2007 00:02:06 +0000 admin http://www.demonclownbaby.com/2007/10/03/insulting-the-baby/ My little Demon Clown Baby was born in July. She has kept us quite busy.

I’ve never been interested in babies before. Mostly they’re rubbish, I’ve always thought. Mine’s neat though. What I find fun is to insult her. Do other parents do this?

When she cries, I tell her to shut her milk-hole.

She’s got a ton of nicknames: jerkface, poopy girl, scumbag #4 (the cats are 1, 2, and 3), whiner, burpy, and milkface, among many others.

If she cries while I’m changing her, I inform her that nobody loves her. I make fun of her for being bald and toothless.

It’s all done in a very loving and soothing voice. My wife is just as bad as I am, too, in case you were wondering.

One of these days we’ll have to curtail this, when she starts to understand language.

But for now it sure is fun.

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