Demon Clown Baby

A old woman is seated by the window on a 747, flying across the country to visit her daughter. Cuddled him her arms is her tiny little poodle, Fifi. Unfortunately, an man seated next to her pulls out an ugly black cigar and lights it up. “Excuse me, sir? There’s, there’s no smoking on this flight, sir” the old woman stammers. The man just looks at her as if to say, “So?”

The old woman coughs, but the old man pays no attention. Then Fifi starts to cough as well. “Sir, your cigar is making my precious Fifi ill. Please extinguish your cigar.” The man just snorts and blows smoke in her face and then in Fifi’s face.

Finally the old woman has enough. She rolls down the window of the plane, grabs the cigar out of his mouth, and throws it out the window.

“Lady, you can smooch your pooch goodbye!” snarls the man, as he grabs Fifi and hurls her out the window. “FIFIIII!” cries the old woman, sobbing.

As the plane finally lands, the woman is still sobbing. But when she gets off the plane, who should she see coming up the runway, but Fifi! And guess what she had in her mouth?

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No, the brick! 0

Two men are working on a construction site. They start to get into an argument about who is stronger. They can’t have a wrestling contest because of the dangerous nature of the site, tools and all sorts of construction materials all over; someone would get hurt. So they decide to throw bricks up in the air, and the one who can throw it highest is the strongest.

The first man takes a brick, and he throws it high up into the air. 10 seconds later, it comes back down with a thud. The 2nd man says, “Ha! That’s all you’ve got?” He throws a brick up into the air, and it takes 20 seconds to come down. “Oh Yeah?!” shouts the first man. He heaves a brick up with a mighty groan and a full minute later, it comes down. “That’s nothing!” snarls the 2nd man. He crouches down, breathes hard, and jumps up, hurling the brick as hard as he can. Five minutes later, it comes down with a tremendous thud. The first man tries again, grunting and sweating, and 20 minutes later the brick comes down. The 2nd man takes his turn, and an hour later, the brick comes down. The first man is getting ready to try again when the foreman comes running out. He starts yelling at the two men. “What is all this commotion? Why aren’t you working?!” They explain the contest. The foreman snorts with derision. “I’ll show you who is the strongest.” He spits on his hands and grabs a brick. He pauses, then hurtles the brick up as hard as he possibly can… and it never came down.