Archive for the ‘meta’ Category.

Getting offended by crib death or cancer

No one reads this site, not even me, so sorry for anyone sitting in the comment queue waiting for moderation. It sometimes takes a while before I get around to approving comments. I get a fair amount of comment spam which is why I have moderation turned on. I assure you, I only delete spam, and edit out foul language with an “[expletive deleted]” tag, so feel free to disagree with me all you want. Freedom, baby.

A new obsenity-filled comment has just been posted in response to this post.

You know, I actually do feel bad that people get offended by anything on this site. Not enough to remove the offending post though, because this is the Internet, and people probably shouldn’t be on it if they get this upset at an element of an inconsequential post on an unknown site. I don’t believe in being intentionally offensive, but this is sorta collateral damage.

That post of mine was not a joke about crib death but a meta-joke about a joke about crib death. And in response to the all-caps question, “NOW WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO THAT BEAUTIFUL BABY OF YOURS? THEN HOW WOULD YOU FEEL?” I would feel terrible, of course. Duh.

My baby is now 10 months old and is simply delightful. I am only now getting over the fear that she’ll just stop breathing. I still check for breathing when she naps, but in more of a cursory way now. I have not lost a child and have no idea what it is like. I’ve imagined how it must feel many times, I have that fatherly fear thing going “I love my family OH NO what if something happens? How did it happen that I’m responsible for other people? I still play with toys!”

So, I am not callous to the idea of SIDS. It’s simply so awful that I must joke about it, to reduce my own worry. If my baby died, I’d probably stop making crib death jokes (I’ve only made 2 in my whole life, they just got the worst reaction.) I’d also not find it funny if someone told me a crib death joke.

But, would it stop that “dead crib” joke from being funny? No, it would not.

If anyone reading this has lost a child, of course you don’t find anything about that funny. And if I told you, specifically you, such a joke, you’d be well within your rights to haul off and punch me in the nose.

But I didn’t tell you. I don’t know you. I told the Internet. If you can get that offended, you shouldn’t be here.

My mother had cancer. When She had surgery, She awoke in the recuperation room to find me there. My first words to Her were “Oh, you’re alive. I guess I owe the Old Man twenty bucks.”

Now, you’ll have to take my word for it that both She and I found this funny. See, I wouldn’t say it to anyone else, but with Her I could joke. (Sometimes.)

Unfortunately the cancer came back a few years later and She’s dead. She’s been dead for almost 5 years now, and I still miss Her.

And cancer jokes are still funny to me. So, go figure.

In closing, save your offense for things that are intentionally offensive. There’s plenty of stuff that offends where people mean it to offend. They’re the jerks you should be yelling at.

My First Comment Spam!

This is a pretty new blog, and I haven’t been trying to promote it (except I tried submitting stuff at Reddit, but it never shows up there), so the only traffic so far is from Google.

So I’ve only got one legit comment as of this writing, and today I got one spam comment. It went into a moderation queue, so it was never live, but I guess if spambots think it’s worth putting their garbage on here, it must mean I’m moving up in the world.

So far most of my hits are the Dr McNinja costume picture, which is pretty cool if I say so myself.

My wife doesn’t even read my blog, so I don’t know why I think anyone else will. Of course, she hears my opinions all the time so doesn’t need to read them as well.

I haven’t been trying to get my friends to read it, because while I don’t post anything I consider private (and cannot comprehend people that do!), it’s a little weird to think of people I know reading my thoughts. I don’t care if people I don’t know read them. Does that make sense to anyone else?

I do have ideas, I just also have a life

I had wanted to update this blog every weekday. That hasn’t happened, but it’s not because I don’t have interesting things to write about. It’s because I have a life.

I have a job, I have a wife (high maintenance, but she’s worth it), I have a baby on the way, a demon clown daughter mind you, that I have to prepare for. I’ve got remodeling to do so the baby has a place to live. That’s mainly self-preservation on my part; I don’t want her sucking out my breath while I sleep, or causing necrosis of the brain, or whatever it is that demon clown babies do. I’m not so much building a nursery as a cute little baby holding facility.

Things I’m happy about: Austin lost the part of Danny in the Broadway revival of Grease. I can’t tell you how happy I am about that. He squicked me out since week one. We actually voted against him, that’s how much we didn’t like him, and we usually never vote because we usually don’t want live tv ever. Tivo, baby.

I’m also happy that someone invented an all-edge brownie pan. Firestar hates the edge, so this is like kryptonite to her. However I like it and I sorta want to get one, plus I could use it for cornbread. But it’s $37 or something, and I’m poor.